TUESDAY
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Edward & Rod: The Brother's McKuen.
Photographed by Diane Kopperman, May 2002 at BB King's New York City
A Thought for Today
Because pride seldom lets us beg
forgiveness, we must content ourselves with dying a little each time a
door is closed.

.ASK
ROD
A few more letters, a few more answers. Lots of different topics as usual.
THE HELL WITH ME?
First I heard November 9th was a small concert at
reasonable prices. Then comes an announcement that it's a super star show
at astronomical prices. After the first announcement I planned to attend.
After the second I gave up. The hell with you. (This E-mail was
unsigned)
Dear Somebody (?) I almost never answer letters from those who for some
reason haven't the courage or courtesy to sign their name to their
correspondence but I'm answering your note because frankly I'm curious to
know what you're talking about.
The appearances in "Something Wonderful" on the 9th & 10th of November
were always performances to benefit charity. I do these shows every spring
and fall as part of David Galligan's repertory company. As such I am
merely one small cog in a larger wheel of performers, artists, producers,
fund-raisers and technicians who try to give something back to a society
that has been very good to each of us. We do it to raise money for others,
not ourselves. No one gets paid for these appearances and every dime of
the money raised goes toward assisting the charities listed in the event
announcements. The ticket prices for any concert of this magnitude run
from 'dear' to 'steep.' Hello! The object is to raise money for worthwhile
causes.
Oh, and we also do it because we enjoy working for David and with each
other.
At $24 for adults and $22 for students & seniors, I feel my solo Sunday
afternoon November 10th concert is very reasonably priced. What would you
consider reasonable?
I don't know about you but when it comes to attending a charity
performance such as "Something Wonderful" I have two criteria for deciding
whether or not I'll go. One: Do I believe enough in the charity involved
to contribute the ticket price and can I afford it? Two: Am I sufficiently
interested in the artists performing to think I'll have a good time? In
every case I have at least three options. Buy tickets and go. Send a
contribution and stay home. Tear up the invitation and forget about it.
At best you have your dates mixed up and I hope I've straightened you out.
At worst in attempting to tell me how I should donate my time, talent and
charitable efforts is more than a little presumptuous on your part.
In any case being brave enough to sign your name to a crank letter will
always receive a kinder, gentler response.
The hell with me? No, the hell with you! Otherwise, Kindest Regards, Rod
CONFIDENTIAL
[This letter arrived with the banner “confidential” but I felt it was of
sufficient general interest to share it with you; so I edited it a bit and
left out the name of the sender.]
Dear Rod, My mother died suddenly and I have just
received her autopsy report only to find out she committed suicide. I
cannot seem to find any poem you've written that acknowledged the pain
that comes with that. Am I missing something? We also used a poem of yours
15 years ago at my sister’s funeral, it spoke of ducks in a row and no one
left to disappoint anymore, we gave you the credit of course. We shared
your books for many long New England winters as teenagers, grown women
then mothers, it only seemed appropriate to share your words at the end.
(My sister was killed in an automobile accident.)
I would be so grateful if you have written of suicide's before if you'd
tell me the title. Best regards. “A Friend”
Dear Friend, I'm really sorry for your loss. Suicide is an act that
presents those of us left behind with so many blanks to fill in. And I'm
pretty sure that most of the answers, excuses, attempts at understanding
and conclusions we come up with are wrong. In the end it is simply
impossible to enter deep enough into someone else's despair to understand
just why anyone would seek something other than this all too precious
life.
Life certainly isn't easy and it often takes courage to get through a day
or a situation but I believe we ought to continue this adventure to its
logical end. I have written about suicide over the years and the poems
that come to mind are those concerning my friend Ralph James Wass who
found life so intolerable that at a very young age he went into a bean
field in 1972 and shot himself.
Two of the 'Ralph Poems,' Ralph and Ralph James Wass, are contained in "We
Touch the Sky" – published in 1979. Ralph was a good friend and had made
for me a unique silver friendship ring. When he died I vowed never to take
it off. I couldn't if I wanted to now because over the years the second
finger on my left hand has grown around it.
I don't know if these poems will be of any comfort to you but perhaps you
will find some consolation in knowing there are so many others who, like
yourself, experience a void left by someone who has taken their own life.
I probably wrote something about suicide in An Outstretched Hand as well.
In the end all any of us can do is be grateful for the time we were able
to spend with those we've loved and cared about who are now no longer with
us. Again my condolences. Affectionately, Rod.
THE HABIT
I have been looking so long for "The Habit" and
can't find a copy. I know I read it in a book. I have searched my books
and can’t find it listed in any of the tables of contents. My copy of
Alone has a page or two missing near the center. Could that possibly be
where it was? Thanks for what you have already given me. Your South
Carolina friend, Janet
Dear Janet, I wrote and recorded "The Habit" for RCA during the late 60's.
In those days I practically lived in the recording studio and there was
never enough space on the LP's I released to accommodate all the songs I
committed to tape. “The Habit” will finally make it's record debut – in
two separate versions – in a boxed set "The RCA Years” to be released next
spring.
The lyrics to the song were contained in a book originally sold only at
concerts, "The Songs of Rod McKuen." It's now available through
Stanyan By Mail. All
the best, Rod
A NEW CALENDAR
Hi, Rod: While going through my collection of items
from years gone by, I came across your calendar that I had kept from
several years ago. It was really nice to revisit the pictures of you, the
hot air balloons, and Mr. Kelly.
Since next year is another landmark year for you -- your Carnegie Hall
concert and a special birthday year -- had you given any thought to doing
another calendar?
This would be a very special way to commemorate this very special year. It
would be a keepsake that many of us would treasure. Jean from Iowa
Dear Jean: A Calendar for next year is a great idea, but alas we're
starting about 13 months too late. Calendar publishers need a long
lead-time in order to process the graphics such a project contains. That
much time and more is needed to map out a sales plan and submit it to book
and chain stores. Most of the 2003 calendars or either on their way or
already on display in stores.
I'm glad you have good memories of the calendars and datebooks of the
past. Me too, but before we turned over material to our Art Director Hy
Fujita, Wade Alexander and I spent a good ten months of research and
editorial work preparing each project. I'm exhausted just thinking about
it. Thanks for the idea though.
Warmly, Rod
FIORE / 1812
Hello, Mr. McKuen! How are you? I would appreciate
your help in finding your poem "Fiore." I would like to purchase the book
that contains it, but can't quite tell which book that is! I'll look
forward to a message from you. Thank you very much for your help.
C. Peterson
Dear CP: Fiore/1812 can be found in the books "Valentines" and "Alone." It
was written for the LP "Sleep Warm." The books but not the album (which is
out of print) can be ordered from
Stanyan By Mail. Thanks
for asking, Cheers, Rod
Sleep warm tonight and don’t forget to join Ken tomorrow for This One Does
It For Me.
RM 10/15/2002 2:11 AM PST Previously unpublished.
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(posted 09/28/2002).
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