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A Thought for Today
To write it out is to let it go.
Dear
Ken,
I enjoyed the Flight Plan of July 25th, which was a flight plan from the
past (December 19, 1998), wherein you wrote the following about the way
Rod sometimes revises his poems:
"Those of you who've followed Rod's work closely over the years will have
noticed how he occasionally revises some of his work, sometimes years
after they were written."
That old Flight Plan also contained a wonderful
example of a revised poem.
I've always been fascinated by the revisions Rod sometimes makes to his
poetry. I've often wondered what prompted the revisions, and what he was
thinking about when he made them, other than the obvious reason, which was
to make them better. I guess we'll never really know. I suspect it's quite
possible that even Rod doesn't always know why. That doesn't matter
though, because, for whatever reason, we're left with more examples of his
beautiful poetry.
I wrote about an interesting series of revisions to one poem early last
year, and I give it to you now. (Saves you a lot of researching, copying
and pasting) *S* Perhaps the readers of the Fight Plans might enjoy
watching the revisions unfolding over several years.
Enjoy,
Larry
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Here's a poem from the British edition of "We Touch The Sky" (1979). Rod
reworked the poem considerably for the American Edition of the book which
was published later that year--only the first two stanzas remained
untouched. Of course a shorter version of the poem appeared in
"Celebrations of the Heart", published in 1975, and yet another version in
1983's "Watch for the Wind".
On reflection, it might be more interesting for you if I were to post all
four versions of the poem in the order in which the books were published,
because each version is quite different.
June Flight
Airborne--free--
running with the sun
diving down the day
jumping through June--
Above the world
part of the shell
of some new world.
Now end over end
dipping with the down-draft.
Hold onto me--I'm falling
catch me--if I do
never like this,
never like this.
- from "Celebrations of the
Heart", 1975
June
Flight
Airborne - free
running with the sun
diving down the day
jumping through June -
Above the world
part of the shell
of some new world.
Now end over end
dipping with the down draft
hold on to me - I'm falling.
Catch me if I do.
Never like this.
Never like this.
And we are just beginning.
Together let us see
if the sky is real.
I don't know
if instructions have been left
on how to go about authentication
but your arms loose about me
seem a starting point.
I can feel
all other elements
and prove them true,
mathematically
and on a drafting board.
Why not your arms
as proof and witness
of the sky.
They carry me aloft
when they encircle me.
I'm free while touching
just your forearm.
Stay awake.
We're flying now
and I've no clue
as to the pilot.
But it's true
I feel him here,
he lifts us both
on higher and higher.
- from the British edition
of "We Touch The Sky", 1979
June
Flight
Airborne--free
running with the sun
diving down the day
jumping through June--
Above the world
part of the shell
of some new world.
Now end over end
dipping with the down draft
hold on to me--I'm falling.
Catch me if I do.
Together
let us climb up
high enough to see
how much of heaven
is reality
and what's invention.
Though no skybound ladder
yet exists
your arms loose about me
seem a starting point.
They carry me aloft
when they encircle me.
I'm free while touching
just your forearm.
Those fragile, gentle arms
like vines that wind around
the strongest brick or board
till neither's sure
of who's supporting whom.
Stay awake.
We're flying now.
Don't let go
nor will I.
The earth has moved
beneath us
now it's gone.
- from the American edition
of "We Touch The Sky", 1979
(The fourth and final version
of the poem is reproduced in the poetry section below).
So there you have it; an example of how Rod
sometimes revises his work over time. I love all four versions of the
poem. I do hope that this was interesting for you, or at least not
repetitious and boring. *S*
Thought hugs,
Larry
Thanks for an interesting
contribution, Larry. I remember your original post on the Board very well
and I'm delighted to give it another airing.
To expand a bit on your topic,
July was an interesting month for me. Prior to leaving on tour Rod
selected all the Flight Plans he wanted to re-run while he was away and
that included selections from this weekly column. As a result I had the
mortifying experience of reading stuff I'd written months, in some cases
years, ago.
Without exception I would,
given the chance, have re-written every column. Wasn't happy with a single
one. I think it has a lot to do with writing to a deadline; you do the
best you can within the time available, then it's off to the
printer, editor, webmaster, whoever. After the event, with the luxury of
time on your side, the urge to tinker is irresistible.
So I quite understand why Rod
revises his work as much as he does. My heart goes out to Jay, though.
He's the poor guy who usually fields all the questions about Rod's work
and it must be difficult for him to come up with the correct version of a
song or poem when he has a number of revisions to choose from.
Thanks again for a thought
provoking letter, Larry.
ken@mckuen.com is the address if you
have a favorite McKuen song or poem you'd like to share with us. Write
soon!
- Ken, Johannesburg,
October 10
Details of Rod's next
appearance can be obtained by following the link below.
"Tap
Your Troubles Away" - the music of Jerry Herman
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